CHAPTER 1 YOU’VE WON THE LOTTERY!
“Pfft…hahaha!What did you just say about how you died?! Chasing after a girl, buying her milk tea, and before you could even deliver it, you got killed by a car?!”
“You know nothing at all…! Ahh! I’m so annoyed! You’ve repeated that story eight times now! Are you really a deity who guides the souls of the dead?!”
Ye Zhibai pointed accusingly with his finger at the Light Orb across from him that was emitting piercing laughter.
The orb was blurry, its brightness almost like light pollution. In fact, the whole environment Ye Zhibai was in was bizarre and fantastical.
He had tried to chase down the self-proclaimed deity, the shoddy orb of light, wanting to punch it!
But it was useless.
In this post-death space… there was simply no concept of distance. Trying to hit a deity with a fist? Impossible in life, let alone in death.
The shape of the orb shifted continuously, morphing with its sharp, echoing laughter. If it were a person, they would be rolling on the floor laughing.
Its voice was genderless, sounding more like a mixture of sounds coming from every direction.
“Hahaha…! Huff…I’m sorry, I’m sorry, let me compose myself. We deities have our dignity, and under normal circumstances, we absolutely do not laugh…except when we can’t help it.”
Ye Zhibai was furious!
The orb paused briefly, then seemed to rise, as if it were picking up something.
It appeared to be reading from something.
“Ah, let’s see here… You’re called Ye Zhibai, orphaned since childhood, average academic performance, mediocre social skills, average looks, almost no friends, terrible luck. You rented a tiny apartment that once caught fire, your financial luck… ha, you’re a money-losing prodigy. Your first paycheck went to medical bills because you were hit by a falling iron basin on your way home from work. Geez, that’s rough. I do feel a bit sorry for you. And then… no romantic experience, died a virgin, pfft!”
“Hey!!!”
“Ah, sorry, sorry. It’s natural for a god to laugh a lot, right? So, the girl you were going to deliver the milk tea to before you died, did she ever agree to date you?”
“No, not yet…but I think it’ll happen soon…”
“Pfft, hahaha! Dream on, wake up—you were killed by a car, remember! And this is why I say bootlickers never prosper! I bet you want to laugh me to death and take over my divine position!”
“I don’t want your divine position, but could you please hurry up and die laughing?! And stop calling me a bootlicker! I just had a complicated fate with that girl… I wasn’t seriously chasing her.”
“Not seriously chasing, yet still killed by a car—what a loss!”
‘Ah… none of this matters anymore.’
If it weren’t for the fact that Ye Zhibai’s body was becoming increasingly unresponsive, he would have jumped right out of this ghastly place for a second attempt at shark-jumping!
Despite his unfortunate life, he had struggled and resisted.
Short on cash? He’d work diligently, but just when he started, the shop would close down.
Growing up without parents, paying tuition left him with barely enough to rent an apartment. One that leaked in the summer and was drafty in the winter… Every meal had to be budgeted carefully!
He had enough of living a life filled with frustrations, and now, in death, he was being relentlessly mocked by this absurd so-called deity.
A man can be killed, but not humiliated!
“Sorry, can I opt out of reincarnation? If I had a choice, I’d rather go down together with you!”
But Ye Zhibai, already a dead man, certainly didn’t have the capacity to make demands of a deity.
The orb didn’t seem to mind Ye Zhibai’s disrespectful remarks. It was just following the rules, doing its job.
“Alright, Ye Zhibai, you’ve given me a good laugh, something I haven’t had in centuries. According to the rules, I should erase all your memories and let you reincarnate as an embryo on this planet. But… it seems there’s been a little complication.”
‘A complication?!’
At that, Ye Zhibai suddenly broke out in a cold sweat.
His face, obscured by light and utterly ordinary, couldn’t actually sweat.
But he had a bad feeling!
This damned orb of light…! It wouldn’t take revenge for my earlier words and quietly prevent my rebirth, would it?
Or something worse…?
“What are you imagining over there, huh? Ah, people these days really do suffer from paranoia, don’t they?”
“Even though I’m a deity, there are higher powers watching over me. Besides, I’m too lazy to bother with your ignorant remarks. So dumb.”
You’re the dumb one!
Wait… can you hear my thoughts?
Ah well, as long as you’re not about to obliterate me on the spot.
The orb fell silent for a moment, and when it spoke again, although it was difficult to discern any particular tone, there seemed to be a hint of “negotiating” in its voice.
“Ha… Ye Zhibai, mere mortal, I happen to be in a good mood today, and you’ve hit the jackpot. You don’t have to lose your memories, and you won’t have to start over as an embryo.”
“What… do you mean… Are you going to bring me back to life?”
The thought of resurrection didn’t exactly thrill Ye Zhibai.
His previous life was undoubtedly a failure—through to university, he never experienced the beauty of the world, only pain, struggle, misfortune, and poverty.
Even if he were resurrected exactly where he left off, it would just be another few decades until he met this pathetic orb again.
But then…
“You think too highly of yourself! Resurrected? If I did that, I might as well quit being a god! There’s never been such a rule since the creation of the universe! Idiot!”
Stung by the orb’s sharp retort, Ye Zhibai bristled.
The orb, having quickly snapped at him, then adopted a “kinder” tone.
“What I mean is, you can keep your memories, and you won’t have to start from scratch as an embryo.”
After a pause, the orb continued: “In the mortal world, there is a perfect vessel created by the supreme mother goddess. That body has no thoughts of its own. From the moment it was cast into the mortal realm, it has been living by mimicking human behaviors minimally, capable of taking care of itself but devoid of emotions and thoughts.”
“Uh, so to others, wouldn’t that just seem like a self-sufficient fool?” Ye Zhibai remarked accurately.
“Tsk.”
“Did you just click your tongue?!”
“No.” The orb ignored Ye Zhibai’s sarcasm and continued, “Under the guidance of the gods, that soulless body was well protected and placed in what you mortals call a wealthy household. Although you were an adopted child, you were absolutely the jewel of the family. So! Ye Zhibai, I now plan to make you the soul of that body—let that shell truly come to life!”
“Eh… Before anything else… why didn’t you gods put a soul in that body when you created it? Isn’t that kind of… odd?”
“That’s why I say you’ve hit the jackpot, right?!”
“……”
His previous question was perfectly ignored, or rather, deliberately overlooked.
Before Ye Zhibai could continue with his questions, the orb, like a pushy salesperson, added more details.
“Let your soul enter that perfect, soulless body. Not only is it extraordinarily beautiful, but it also possesses wealth as vast as mountains of gold and silver. And women? They will come easily, as many as you desire. Plus, you definitely won’t get killed by a truck again. What do you think, are you tempted? If you’re moved, why not act now? Just say you agree, and I’ll help your soul merge with the body, and you’ll be reborn!”
“What if… I refuse?”
“Then, then you just keep waiting in line! Whenever we remember you, we’ll let you reincarnate normally!”
“……”
Playing hardball, huh?
Ye Zhibai had a feeling that if he refused, this shameless orb might make him wait forever!
About the orb’s proposal…
Was he hesitant?
Honestly, he was a bit.
After all, the orb seemed as trustworthy as a telecom scammer, which would make anyone skeptical.
But to Ye Zhibai…
Those hesitations seemed unnecessary.
Could anything be worse than his life had been?
Impossible… Ye Zhibai felt like crying for himself just thinking about his miserable life.
And the orb had mentioned earlier.
This time… there wouldn’t be so much misfortune. He would meet the right girl, experience a… sweet romance.
If he could have all that, what would a few unknown risks matter?
Pfft… It turns out the deity is quite humane, at least letting me make my own choice.
In his whole life, up to university, Ye Zhibai never had the courage or confidence to quickly and decisively make a big decision.
He hadn’t had the courage in life… at least in death, let him be reckless and carefree for once.
Ye Zhibai looked up directly at the glowing orb, smiling, subconsciously clenching his fist.
And with that, he stretched out his arm.
“Alright, light… er, Divine Lord, I accept your proposal, I jus…”
“Deal done!!!”
“?!?”
I haven’t finished speaking yet?!
Why don’t you let me complete the one decisive decision of my life with flair?
The moment Ye Zhibai agreed, the orb of light burst into a spectrum of colorful beams, swirling around him, gently lifting his body upwards.
Ye Zhibai could feel his body becoming lighter, the radiance around him growing stronger. His once solid body began to dissolve into specks of light, scattering and then coalescing.
Ha… Ready to embrace my second life?
This life… with no tumult, no lingering concerns.
No concerns?
Suddenly, an image of a long-haired silhouette flashed through Ye Zhibai’s mind, but it too dispersed with the light, fading into brilliance.
Let it go… let it all go.
This time, I don’t ask for riches or power.
Just to live joyfully, with a life full of excitement.
Hehe… Of course, if this time I have a handsome face and superior circumstances, I must find a girl whose heart resonates with mine.
Ye Zhibai closed his eyes contentedly, feeling his soul’s light slowly descending, when he heard that cheeky voice of the orb once more.
“Oh right! I forgot to mention one little thing? Your new body is that of a girl! Super pretty and cute! You’re definitely going to love it!”
“?!?”
The previously content Ye Zhibai suddenly snapped his eyes open.
No… as a soul, he no longer had eyes, but he needed to express his shock somehow!
“A girl?! Why didn’t you say so earlier?!!”
“I thought you might not agree if I told you earlier, what do you care~ Anyway, you’ve already agreed, no room for regrets now, oh and by the way, it might take some time for your soul to fully integrate with the body. You might find it difficult to make facial expressions or speak at first~ But hang in there, I believe you can totally rock your second life as a girl! Hehe!”
“ “Hehe! ” your head, you cheeky ghost!”
This time, Ye Zhibai would not get another chance to curse at the deity.
His soul was already zipping down towards the mortal world~
Damn orb!
Never let me see you again!! Ever!!!
